Ive been reading up on
DIY steady cams.

Real funny stuff.

Wonder if i will be able to make one
in a couple of months but i sure do
Hope.

Here Im standing accused.
With ur fist in my face.
Feeling tired and bruised.
With ur bitterest taste.

All my useless advice.
All my hanging around.
Or are you cutting down the sides?
Or am I bringing you down?

All ur stupid ideas.
U got ur head in the clouds.
U should see how it feels.
With ur feet on the ground.
-Useless Depeche Mode

When a man is released after a
life time behind bars, he is no better
than a baby.
Amused by every little thing he sees.
Lost in transition.

Isnt it better for one to face the gallows?
Well as Red said,
"Get busy living or get busy dying."
He chose to live.

Well on a different note,
Here's something interesting.
Sim n I were chatting the other day.
We spoke about arranged marriages.

Imagine marrying someone from a
maid agency.

You would feel like god as she would
call you 'Sir' 24/7.
You can get as many wives as u'd wish.
You can always send em back to the agent.
You can have different wives just to do specific tasks.
And so much more.

Haha.
Its funnier when she said it.

Woke up to a crying Sis in law
telling me her granny past away
back in Japan.

I guess that's life.

I thank the lord that I woke up today.
Why?
Cuz most people die in their sleep.

Isnt it strange.
U never know when ur gonna die.
It freaks me.
Ive thought about after life so many times.

Ive heard so many different stories.
I could die crossing the road today.
Or live till i cant cross one.

But the milkyway is always gonna be waiting.

My dad has a close friend
who was given a CPR to bring him back to life
in hospital.

When he told us what he saw.
We were simply amazed.
It was too dramatic n true to be the
figment of one's imagination.

I dont wanna start any blasphemous rumours.
But i think that god's gotta sick sense of humour.
N when i die, i expect to find him laughing.

Happy Birthday to U!
Happy Birthday to U!
Happy Birthday to Sarina!
Happy Birthday to U!

Happy Birthday Sarina!
Thanks for being a wonderful buddie.
The lady among the thorns in our marketin group.
All those wonderful evenings at Canteen 5.

The stuff we pple did.
Along with Justin, Darryl n Shaun.
Endless teasing.
Endless laughter.
Endless fun.

Plain memories now ai.
Wish we were in the same group again!

See ya tomorrow n
ur so gonna haf a kickass 21st!

Im feelin good today.
For the first time in 2 weeks.
Spending time at home.

Ma bro was home cuz its his off day.
Dad was tryin 2 crack me up.

I woke up at like six.
Came out of ma room at eleven.
Just sat n read in my room.

The screenplay of Citizen Kane.
Awesome.
Needed something to drown myself in.
It did the work.

I feel fresh now.
I feel so much betta after resting all day.

Thanks Nivi.
Ur the man.
Sad the reds lost man.
Anyway we are gonna kick arnd much more after ur As.
Funky betta keep himself free.

Maybe we ought to call Kevin n Co. back.

Some photos are up.
Check em if u want to.

Mattew.
Fuck wif me again n i swear.
I wont hesitate to blow ur otha eye
n make u totally blind.

This aint a warning.
Take it as a threat.
Wats the diff?
I dont give 2 fucks.

I dont talk like this daily.
So this makes sense.

I may smile.
I may joke.
But there is this otha side to me.
Beware of it Mr.
Cuz i can be ur biggest nightmare.

I aint no punching bag for ur shit.
Give me crap.
I swear i'll throw my crap n pee back atcha!

I havent lost it for years.
Ive never felt this mad in years.

I dont wanna go near any mirrors.
Id probably break it.
Again.

Mattew.
U may read this.
U may not.
U know ma URL.
So if u are...
U fuckin betta shut ur trap.

N Nivi.
Thanks for being there.
We'll kick arnd soon ya.
I promise.

N a special fuck goes out to Robert!
Rite Nivi?

Pple Im in the worst of moods.
This was a side I thought i buried years back.

Mattew.
Talk to ma bro n ur ass will blow.
Fuckin Haha.

Bus no 61.
Broke down.
Sunday.
3.18pm
On it's way to Bras Basah.
Wonderful.

Anyway i just downloaded Enjoy the Silence.
By Depeche Mode.
Was watching the video.

Next thing i knew.
They were playin it in Athens.

They were playing it during the break
at the swimming complex.

Ive been arnd for 7170 days now.
Does time fly or what?

Every life time is like a day.
U've got 24hrs.

Some have made appointments for
later in the day.

Some just sit back and recollect
what happened earlier.

Our age acts as a clock n reminds us
of the time.

Now to think about it.
Its more than just like a day.
Its more like a time-bomb.

U never know when its gonna blow.
Seize the moment.

Achieve wat u can before it blows.
I hope i can get wat i want.

I wanna know who i really am.
Do i know me?
At least be4 i think i know others.
Many dont even know their own backs.

Dave Gahan may say
"its only when i loose maself wif someone else
that id find maself."

Id beg to differ.

I see myself in the mirror.
Its an ugly sight.
But atleast its plain n clear.

He thought.
He scribbled.

Speaker's Corner?
I was there.

U cant talk abt politics.
Ur surrounded by detectives.

Wat am i supposed to talk abt?
Bird Flu?!

Wanna hear pple speakin their minds?
Go outside Robert shop at Spottisville.

I enjoyed ur rally.
Thanks.

My advert.
The actual pic had this Stallion.
N it claimed it was a breed apart.

Hope my advert aint the cause of
a sharp drop in sales for Nikon! ;)

I read it.
Shawshank Redemption.

I luved it.
Beats the movie.
The screenplay is awesome.

Every line tells a story.
The movie is full of quotes.

Kon freaks...
This is for U.

No movie highlights institutionalization
more than this one.

"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies."

This saying is said towards the end of the movie.
Morgan Freeman says it.

Just inform me if u guys wanna read it.

I can send it over.

I just got home.
2222.
Thats the time on ma pc.

I went to the Esplanade today.
I was sittin tn the canopy.
waitin for ma friend.

Just then this afro lad came up
to me and asked if he could interview me.
I said sure.
I turned to look at his crew.

It was ma soccer buddie Ken!
He was like "is that u manoJ?"

I was like yeah.
He asked me qns on Singaporeans wif fake
accents.
KickasS!
He sure found the rite fella for the qn.

I just sat there.
Didnt feel like movin.

A mexican standoff.
But.
No guns.
Just mouths.

Not outside a saloon.
But inside a questioning room.
Dark.
Just a 40v bulb.

The difference between the two men?
Law.
One is a police.
The other is a criminal.

One lie stands between them.
& its gonna kill one of em.

16mm pictures.
in the making.

We may be in the California stage of our lives...
Is dressing like that girl necessary?

Wateva ur race...
Our forefathers spent these years helping their parents.
Working their asses off.
Saving every cent for a rainny day.

Have we seen such rainny days?
We splash em on clothes n stuff.
While our forefathers lived lives filled with dour.
Why speak abt forefathers?
Some of our parents are living evidences of this reality.

The things we wear are an illusion.
Just like how our Chinese forefathers smoked Opium.
Just like how pple in Madras turn to movies till today.

Free urselves n touch ur souls.
Does the guilt of your actions hit ya like a brick wall?
or does it give ya sadistic joy?

I am disgusted at myself when i think abt some of my actions.
I seek redemption.
Is that the term meant for me?

At the end of everyday.
I ask if my actions for the day were justifiable.
Id rather shut my eyes n fall asleep.
Again running from the harsh reality.

If i were to see the milkyway today.
N if my fate was to be judged upon this very days actions.
Wat would my fate be?
I ask this every night.
Trust me it freaks me.

These are not the words of a noble prize winner.
Neither that of one on the green mile.
Its that of mine.

16mm pictures.
In the making.

The answer to life.

Im sick.
This sucks.

If u wanted to shoot some movie.
U know scary shit.
The kind where some asteroid is gonna hit earth.

N u wanna film a scene where people
are staring at the sky.
As in loads n loads of people juz staring at the sky....
Today was the day.

I went to Tanjong Something.
Near kallang.
Very very cool.

People just standing n staring at the sky.
Waitin for the fireworks.
Just 5mins of it.

Beautiful fireworks.
Never seen such wonderful stuff in Singapore.
We luved every second.

SBS buses suck.
I got onto 196.
Fuckin hot n stuffy.

Air con was down.
People flocked into the bus.
It didnt help.

Oh i had advert meeting in the morning.
Finalised loads of stuff.
Feels good.
Yeah.
That was ma National Day Monday.
Oh ma niece almost spoilt ma bro's DVD player.
She shoved her teletubbies VCD into the machine.

2 years old.
No wonder people say "terrible twos" or something
like that.
Apparently kids are in their prime at two.
Adios.

K this seriously sucks.
This is happening for the second time.
I wrote so much n its all gone.
Argh!

Well I caught two movies last week.
I robot n Village.

I robot was ok.More like matrix 4.
Loads of effects.
Story fell flat though.
One or two catchy lines.

Village?
Not at all a let down.
Beautiful cinematography.
Guess he is good at doing country shows.
Remember signs?
Ya.

I did ma interview on Friday.
How was it?
Went ok.

I luv the Toa Payoh interchange.
Fuckin Air Con!
Ha.

I was on the bus.
143.
2 Hopper wannabes.

U know.
The huge shoes.
Football jerseys.
NY bling blings.

I was watchin em.
Oh.
I observe characters.

Their accent sucked though.
Here comes the anti-climax.

They whipped out those blue pieces of papers.
Oil removers?
Started wiping their faces.
I was smiling to maself.
They sure did notice me.

Went to Esplanade for ad meeting.
N then to Boat Quay with funky.

He is the man.
No hidden agendas.
15 years of brotherhood.
No arguments or anything.

We can go out for a whole day
Without talking and feel uncomfortable.
Thanks brotha.

I mean… hell…
Who knows me better than him?
15 years is super long!
Nivi?

Hey u betta meet us after ur As!
Right Funky?
Haha.

PM is giving his speech.
I’ll miss him.
I respect him.
He was clean.

Normal.
Doesnt put a fake front.
He was no white horse as a teen.

He lived it worse than us.
He felt for us.
Trust me thinks are gonna change.

He had a dream like Martin L King.
Did he live it?
He sure did help live mine.

Adios.

"Fighting for peace is like fuckin for Virginity"

Is that the case we are facing today?

With leaders using their asses to think...
Loosers using bombs to think...
Celebrities caught up with a 1001 scandals...
Adults caught in a terrene of their own...
& teens wanting their lives to be Enigmas...

Im not surprised.
Peace pple.

16mm pictures.
In the making.

Hey I've put up some pix taken
at the LP concert.

Check em if u want to ya.

Taken by ma 2nd bro actually.

Adios

Here's something interesting.
I just read that Africans used to call funerals "home-goings"...
Wonder why?